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Elvis Costello lyrics
This Offer Is Unrepeatable lyrics DON'T SEND ANY MONEY!
Fate has no price
Ignore at your peril this splendid advice
An invaluable link in an infinite chain
An offer like this will just not come again
You wish you had women to charm and bewitch
Power of life and death over the rich young girls will be swooning
Because you're exciting them
And not only fall at your feet but be biting them
Guaranteed, guaranteed to capture your breath
Or just possibly scare you to death
Sign it and seal it and send it to friends
But don't mention my name
Don't make any long term plans
In thirty-six hours your fortunes will change
Your best friends won't know you
And neither will strangers
Do not keep this letter
It must leave your hand
You have been selected from over five thousand
A twister or dupe will bamboozle or hoodwink you
I can't say more it would only confuse you
The wine that they offer will go to your head
And you'll start to see double in fishes and bread
Guaranteed, guaranteed for a lifetime or more
Guaranteed, for this world and the next
Guaranteed, guaranteed for the world and its mother
Cherish this life as you don't get another one
UNLESS you should take up this fabulous offer
Don't leave it too late or you'll be bound to suffer
And woebetide anyone so woebegone
You won't know you're born or about to pass on
You'll never get tired
You'll never get bored
By the way I just hope you're insured
And if you're not satisfied
If you want more
We can always provide an improved overture
Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable
This offer is unrepeatable
Your trouble will vanish
Your tears will dry
Your blessing will just multiply
Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable
This offer is unrepeatable
Guaranteed, guaranteed to bring fortune and favor
In a riot of colours, (a variety of) and flavours
Guaranteed at a price that is almost unbeatable
This offer is unrepeatable
Would I lie to you? Would I sell you a dud?
Just sign on the line. Could you possibly write it in blood?
Other Elvis Costello lyrics:
Blame it on Cain lyrics Cheap Reward lyrics I'm Not Angry lyrics Imagination (Is A Powerful Deceiver) lyrics Miracle Man lyrics Pay it Back lyrics Poison Moon lyrics Radio Sweetheart lyrics Sneaky Feelings lyrics Stranger In The House lyrics Waiting for the End of the World lyrics Wave A White Flag lyrics (the angels wanna wear my) Red Shoes lyrics Jump Up lyrics Less Than Zero lyrics Mystery Dance lyrics No Dancing lyrics Mystery Dance(Acoustic w\ Extra Verse) lyrics Welcome to the Working Week lyrics Big Tears lyrics Hand In Hand lyrics Lipstick Vogue lyrics Lip Service lyrics Little Triggers lyrics Living In Paradise lyrics Night Rally lyrics No Action lyrics Running Out of Angels lyrics The Beat lyrics This Year's Girl lyrics You Belong To Me lyrics Crawling To The U.S.A. lyrics Alison (LIVE) lyrics Big Boys lyrics Busy Bodies lyrics Chemistry Class lyrics Clean Money lyrics Goon Squad lyrics Moods For Moderns lyrics My Funny Valentine lyrics Party Girl lyrics Senior Service lyrics Sunday's Best lyrics Talking In The Dark lyrics Tiny Steps lyrics Two Little Hitlers lyrics Wednesday Week lyrics Green Shirt lyrics Watching the Detectives (LIVE) lyrics 5ive Gears In Reverse lyrics Beaten To The Punch lyrics Black And White World lyrics B Movie lyrics Clowntime Is Over lyrics Clowntime Is Over No. 2 lyrics Dr. Luther's Assistant lyrics Getting Mighty Crowded lyrics Ghost Train lyrics Hoover Factory lyrics Human Touch lyrics I Stand Accused lyrics Just A Memory lyrics King Horse lyrics Love For Tender lyrics Men Called Uncle lyrics Possession lyrics Riot Act lyrics Secondary Modern lyrics So Young lyrics Temptation lyrics The Imposter lyrics Opportunity lyrics Brown To Blue lyrics Colour Of The Blues lyrics Cry, Cry, Cry lyrics Darling,You Know I Wouldn't Lie lyrics He's Got You lyrics Honey Hush lyrics How Much I Lied lyrics I'm Your Toy lyrics My Shoes Keep Walking Back To You lyrics Psycho lyrics Sweet Dreams lyrics There Won't Be Anymore lyrics Tonight The Bottle Let Me Down lyrics Too Far Gone lyrics Why Don't You Love Me (Like You Used To Do)? lyrics Your Angel Steps Out Of Heaven lyrics Sittin' And Thinkin' lyrics Success lyrics Big Sister lyrics Black Sails In The Sunset lyrics Different Finger lyrics Fish 'n' Chip Paper lyrics From A Whisper to A Scream lyrics Gloomy Sunday lyrics Lover's Walk lyrics Love For Sale lyrics Luxembourg lyrics New Lace Sleeves lyrics Pretty Words lyrics Sad About Girls lyrics Shot With His Own Gun lyrics Strict Time lyrics Twenty-Five To Twelve lyrics Weeper's Dream lyrics White Knuckles lyrics You'll Never Be A Man lyrics Big Sister's Clothes lyrics Charm School lyrics Everyday I Write The Book (Live) lyrics King Of Thieves lyrics Let Them All Talk lyrics Love Went Mad lyrics Mouth Almighty lyrics Pills And Soap lyrics The Element Within Her lyrics The Flirting Kind lyrics The Greatest Thing lyrics The Invisible Man lyrics The World And His Wife lyrics TKO (Boxing Day) lyrics Town Where Time Stood Still lyrics Walking On Thin Ice lyrics Heathen Town lyrics The World and His Wife (Live) lyrics Baby It's You lyrics Get Yourself Another Fool lyrics Home Truth lyrics Inch By Inch lyrics I Wanna Be Loved lyrics Joe Porterhouse lyrics Room With No Number lyrics Sleepless Nights lyrics Sour Milk-Cow Blues lyrics The Only Flame In Town lyrics Turning The Town Red lyrics Worthless Thing lyrics Motel Matches lyrics Peace In Our Time lyrics The Great Unknown lyrics A Town Called Big Nothing lyrics Blue Chair lyrics Forgive Her Anything lyrics I Hope You're Happy Now lyrics Next Time 'Round lyrics Poor Napoleon lyrics Uncomplicated lyrics American Without Tears #2 lyrics Baby's Got A Brand New Hairdo lyrics Battered Old Bird lyrics Crimes Of Paris lyrics Home is Anywhere lyrics Seven Day Weekend lyrics Tokyo Storm Warning lyrics Any King's Shilling lyrics Baby Plays Around lyrics Satellite lyrics ... This Town ... lyrics Chewing Gum lyrics Coal Train Robberies lyrics God's Comic lyrics Last Boat Leaving lyrics Let Him Dangle lyrics Miss Macbeth lyrics Pads, Paws And Claws lyrics Stalin Malone(Instrumental) lyrics Broken lyrics Interlude:Couldn't Call It Unexpected lyrics Invasion Hit Parade lyrics Playboy to a Man lyrics Sweet Pear lyrics After the Fall lyrics Georgie and Her Rival lyrics Harpies Bizarre lyrics How to Be Dumb lyrics Dead Letter lyrics Deliver Us lyrics Expert Rites lyrics Jacksons, Monk and Rowe lyrics Last Post lyrics Romeo's Seance lyrics Swine lyrics Taking My Life In Your Hands lyrics The First to Leave lyrics This Sad Burlesque lyrics Who Do You Think You Are? lyrics Why? lyrics Damnation's Cellar lyrics Dear Sweet Filthy World lyrics For Other Eyes lyrics The Letter Home lyrics I Almost Had A Weakness lyrics I Thought I'd Write to Juliet lyrics Clown Strike lyrics Favourite Hour lyrics Just About Glad lyrics Still Too Soon to Know lyrics 20% Amnesia lyrics My Science Fiction Twin lyrics Pony Street lyrics Rocking Horse Road lyrics This Is Hell lyrics You Tripped at Every Step lyrics ...And in Every Home lyrics Boy With a Problem lyrics From Head To Toe lyrics Imperial Bedroom lyrics I Turn Around lyrics Kid About it lyrics Little Savage lyrics Night Time lyrics Pidgin English lyrics Really Mystified lyrics Seconds Of Pleasure lyrics Shabby Doll lyrics Tears Before Bedtime lyrics The Long Honeymoon lyrics The Loved Ones lyrics Town Cryer lyrics The World Of Broken Hearts lyrics You Little Fool lyrics Human Hands lyrics The Stamping Ground lyrics (I Don't Want To Go To) Chelsea lyrics Accidents Will Happen lyrics Alison lyrics Beyond Belief lyrics Clubland lyrics Everyday I Write The Book lyrics High Fidelity lyrics I Can't Stand Up For lyrics Love Field lyrics Man Out of Time lyrics New Amsterdam lyrics Oliver's Army lyrics Pump It Up lyrics Radio Radio lyrics Watch Your Step lyrics I Want You lyrics (What's So Funny 'Bout)Peace, Love And Understanding lyrics Good Year For The Roses lyrics Watching the Detectives lyrics Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood lyrics Eisenhower blues lyrics Glitter Gulch lyrics Jack Of All Parades lyrics King Of Confidence lyrics Little Palaces lyrics Lovable lyrics Our Little Angel lyrics Poisoned Rose lyrics Shoes Without Heels lyrics Suffering Face lyrics The People's Limousine lyrics American Without Tears lyrics Brilliant Mistake lyrics I'll Wear It Proudly lyrics Sleep Of The Just lyrics Suit of Lights lyrics They'll Never Take Her lyrics The Big Light lyrics Bama Lama Bama Loo lyrics Days lyrics Everybody's Crying Mercy lyrics I've Been Wrong Before lyrics I Threw it All Away lyrics Leave my Kitten Alone lyrics Must You Throw Dirt In My Face lyrics Payday lyrics Please Stay lyrics Pouring Water On A Drowning Man lyrics Remove This Doubt lyrics Running Out of Fools lyrics Strange lyrics The Very Thought of You lyrics Hidden Charms lyrics Distorted Angel lyrics It's Time lyrics Shallow Graves lyrics Why Can't A Man Stand Alone? lyrics Complicated Shadows lyrics Little Atoms lyrics Starting To Come To Me lyrics You Bowed Down lyrics Almost Blue lyrics Deep Dead Blue lyrics Dirty Rotten Shame lyrics Girls Talk lyrics Hidden Shame lyrics Indoor Fireworks lyrics Miss Mary lyrics Punishing Kiss lyrics Shadow and Jimmy lyrics Shamed Into Love lyrics Shipbuilding lyrics The Comedians lyrics The Other End (of the Telescope) lyrics Upon A Veil Of Midnight Blue lyrics All Grown Up lyrics My Brave Face lyrics Shatterproof lyrics The Deportees Club lyrics Unwanted Number lyrics 13 Steps Lead Down lyrics Deep Dark Truthful Mirror lyrics Hurry Down Doomsday lyrics I Want to Vanish lyrics Kinder Murder lyrics My Dark Life lyrics The Birds Will Still Be Singing lyrics The Bridge I Burned lyrics All the Rage lyrics All This Useless Beauty lyrics Couldn't Call It Unexpected No.4 lyrics London's Brilliant Parade lyrics Poor Fractured Atlas lyrics So Like Candy lyrics Sulky Girl lyrics The Other Side of Summer lyrics Tramp The Dirt Down lyrics Veronica lyrics God Give Me Strength lyrics I Still Have That Other Girl lyrics Painted From Memory lyrics Such Unlikely Lovers lyrics Tears At The Birthday Party lyrics This House Is Empty Now lyrics Vamp Dolce lyrics What's Her Name Today? lyrics In The Darkest Place lyrics My Thief lyrics The Long Division lyrics The Sweetest Punch lyrics Toledo lyrics
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